WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
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Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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