i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
