I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize