A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
