I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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