just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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