3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I deserve this hangover.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
