More tranny stories later!
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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