all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
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