Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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