I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize