I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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