who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
