i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
