Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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