I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize