Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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