Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
The feeling are messing with the penis
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
