Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
