Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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