I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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