i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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