i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
i out mim tonsoeep
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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