I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
My dick has a subreddit
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize