My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize