the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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