hell yes lets make some ravioli
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Dear god my vagina.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize