'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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