Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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