You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize