Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize