I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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