you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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