Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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