I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize