I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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