I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
