i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
