I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
