I just saw a hot homeless man
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
