tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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