Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
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Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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