Porn is love you can see.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
