before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
