Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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