so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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