So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
