There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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