why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
