I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
