i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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